It’s all right, Northwest Whitfield fans. It’s going to be fine. You just have to deal with the fact that only one Whitfield was right this past Friday night.
Don’t hate me because I am beautiful. I don’t call myself the Guru of Gridiron Guessing just because I am a fan of consonance and alliteration.
I don’t necessarily even want these powers. But like Superman, sometimes you just have to work with the hand you are dealt. He’s faster than a speeding bullet, and my pigskin picking prowess (again with the alliteration?) is more powerful than a locomotive.
We didn’t ask to be superheroes. It is just forced upon us. We both have the same day job, he just has a lot better hair.
So what do we know with four weeks of the regular season remaining and what are some things we can surmise?
We know that I am right. We can surmise that Dalton will play Cedartown for the Region 7-4A title. We know that Southeast Whitfield must beat Northwest Whitfield to have a chance at making the state playoffs. We can surmise that only three teams from the area will play an 11th game. We know that I am right. We know that I do not hate Preston Poag.
Some people are apparently late to the party and don’t know that the Christian Heritage coach and I have been “feuding” throughout the entire football season in this column and I have been poking Poag with jabs each week. I pick at the Lions, they win, I get a seat cushion and everyone is happy. This has been a running joke all season long.
Now, Poag hasn’t invited me over for a barbecue nor is he the godfather to my son, but we don’t hate each other. Far from it. Admittedly, our “feud” has been one-sided since I have the keyboard, so here’s an open invitation to all the Preston Peeps out there: Send me your best zinger on the Guru.
Nothing is off limits. Nothing is out of bounds as long as it is suitable for print in a family newspaper. Come up with your best shot at me (the funnier the better), and I will gladly get it in the paper. By the way, I made this same offer to coach Poag, but he is either too busy trying to win football games or his mind couldn’t come up with anything good.
Goshdarnit! There I go again, shooting off my big mouth.
Last week the Guru was 4-1 with those meddling kids from Southeast ruining my scheme. On the year, I am 32-9.
Now on to the picks.
• Game of the Week — Northwest Whitfield at Ridgeland: I have been hearing reports of the Bruins having their best practices of the season this week.
That is the best way to bounce back from a heartbreaking loss.
The worst way to bounce back from a heartbreaking loss? Lose again.
The loss to Dalton will define Northwest’s year only if the Bruins allow it to. Securing a playoff berth would go a long way toward putting salve on the wound, and a win over Ridgeland is sorely needed.
Whit’s Pick: Northwest 35, Ridgeland 17
• LaFayette at Dalton: This shouldn’t be a close game, but we all know how those kind of things play out. I could easily see LaFayette able to keep this game close for a quarter and a half before Dalton finally wakes up from its slumber, but it should be over rather quickly after that.
Whit’s Pick: Dalton 48, LaFayette 8
• Heritage-Catoosa at Southeast Whitfield: What in the world is going on, Raiders? For the past three seasons, you have wanted me to pick you. You have called me a hater when I haven’t picked you. You have started Facebook threads longer the Obamacare law bemoaning my lack of love.
Then I start picking you to win, and you let me down? You win me over and then drop me down a flight of stairs like this?
Ridgeland was the Raiders’ chance to grab what coach Sean Gray called a “signature win.” A win over Heritage isn’t a signature win, but at least it will put a lot of importance on the game against Northwest.
Whit’s Pick: Southeast 35, Heritage 20
• Coahulla Creek at Lakeview-Fort Oglethorpe: The Colts and the Warriors were both off last week, but they probably felt quite different during their break. Coahulla Creek was coming off of a 14-6 win over Gordon Central, while LFO has stewed after a 76-13 woodshedding by Cartersville. This should be a pretty evenly matched game.
Whit’s Pick: Lakeview-Fort Oglethorpe 21, Coahulla Creek 13
• Ringgold at North Murray: Snake-bit or growing pains, whatever you want to call it, it hasn’t been very pretty in the win column for the Mountaineers this year. It doesn’t get any better looking with Ringgold coming to town.
Whit’s Pick: Ringgold 42, North Murray 21
• Calhoun at Murray County: We’re not just talking about a gap between the haves and the have-nots in this region.
It’s more like teams with nuclear weapons going against a third-grade slingshot gang.
Whit’s Pick: Calhoun 65, Murray County 8
Chris Whitfield is a sports writer for The Daily Citizen. He appreciates a good insult. You can write to him at firstname.lastname@example.org.