November 30, 2008

Column: Tech not motivated to win, just better coached

Word on the street is that on the morning of Oct. 26, Mark Richt – head motivator of the Georgia Bulldogs football team – was in his living room, listening to the Carpets of Dalton theme song and relaxing with a cup of coffee as part of his daily routine. With a copy of The Daily Citizen in hand, Richt nearly fell out of his complimentary recliner upon reading my column predicting a Nov. 29 Georgia Tech victory in Athens.

As head motivator of the Bulldogs, Richt realized a column predicting Georgia’s fate would surely make for great bulletin board material. So he gathered his assistant motivators for a meeting to discuss the column and other important factors for the Georgia Tech affair, like which color jersey the team should wear and how it should celebrate its first touchdown of the game. After the meeting, the motivators and players hit the film room to study Richt’s Carpets of Dalton commercial.

Meanwhile in Atlanta, poor old Georgia Tech‘s football program doesn’t even have a motivator. All they have is a coach. The Jackets are missing out on all of the fun with head coach Paul Johnson at the helm. Instead of picking their favorite jersey color, the Jackets had to learn the stupid triple-option offense. How boring.

And they’re supposed to execute this offense with a sophomore quarterback, a sophomore running back and a freshman running back? How was that supposed to work? Are you telling me a coach is going to teach them how to play? Even if this crazy plan were to work, how would the Jackets get motivated to play?

Somehow, the Jackets adapted to Johnson’s offense and marched into Athens with an 8-3 record. But they were still missing a motivator. Heading into the Georgia game, they were in trouble because Richt was mastering his motivational ways by coaching less, even saying so in an Associated Press story that ran on game day.

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